October 20, 2008

In some aspects I feel like I have been lying to myself, and that God is “calling me out” on it. It’s time for true change, accountability and healing. It’s not even a matter of walking the fence; it’s a matter of walking two separate roads. The result is a tangible feeling of schizophrenia. I am ready to be constant, honest and above all: holy.



Needless to say, I have a feeling it’s not going to be a fun journey.


I read a cool quote this morning:


Only in the context of grace can we face our sin; only in the place of healing do we dare to show our wounds; only with a single-minded attention to Christ can we give up our clinging fears and face our own true nature. As we come to realize that it is not we who live, but Christ who lives in us, that he is our true self, we can slowly let our compulsions melt away and begin to experience the freedom of the children of God. And then we can look back with a smile and realize that we aren’t even angry or greedy any more.” [emphasis added]


– Henri Nouwen



  1. you always leave me thinking. you are a true treasure, friend

  2. Thanks, Sarah! You ever notice how the best songs, movies, pictures, art pieces are just simply honest? I kind of feel that way about blogging sometimes.

  3. interesting. maybe this is why poetry can be appealing – it can be an opaque honesty.

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